Non-reaction is the best action

By Sumit Paul

Ten per cent of life is made up of what happens to you. Ninety per cent of life is decided by how you react. Most of the unpleasant incidents in life can be averted if we choose not to react.

We often react because we mistakenly think that if we don’t, the other person will assume we’re afraid. It’s our fragile ego that makes us react violently. A reaction gives birth to yet another reaction, and this goes on. There’s no end to it. Reaction is a sudden manifestation of anger. It’s a sign of impulsive behaviour. So, not reacting is always sagacious because non-reaction frustrates the other person. In other words, non-reaction is the best action.

When an angry villager abused the Buddha, he coolly asked the villager, “Son, do you still have anything to say?” That man was utterly ashamed. We can all follow this because reaction intensifies action, making it difficult to control. When fire breaks out in the jungle, it’s drawn to dry leaves, and from there, it spreads all over the forest. Reactions are like dry leaves; they attract actions to turn into conflagration. Avoid them if you want to live peacefully.

Behavioural psychologists are of the view that to react is human. It’s in our DNA. So, what should we do? Someone very wittily said that the human itch to react can be replaced with responding. A response is always a watered-down reaction. The difference between responding and reacting is a choice. You must decide whether to react or respond. By reacting rather than responding, we indirectly reveal our level of emotional intelligence. At the same time, a reaction is a telltale of our maturity (or lack thereof) and inner fabric. To quote Urdu poet Hasrat Nazim, “Mere jawaab ne meri auqaat bata di/Rahta khaamosh to aqlmand kahlata” – my reply revealed my character/Had i chosen to keep mum, i’d have been called an intelligent person. Not everything and everyone needs your reaction. Reacting is recklessness. Protect your peace and keep walking.

Sometimes, the most powerful response involves observing, reflecting, and choosing silence or inaction. Just because you don’t react doesn’t mean you don’t notice. Silence isn’t always a sign of ignorance; it can be the strongest form of observation. You’ll continue to suffer if you’ve an emotional reaction to everything said to you. True power is sitting back and observing everything with logic. True power is restraint. If words control you that means everything else can control you. Breathe and allow things to pass. A Chinese proverb states that when you don’t react, you irritate the person who expects a reaction from you. He may lose his peace of mind, but you retain your calm.

Non-reaction is extreme indifference, even apathy; it’s your non-verbal reaction which involves ignoring all that’s petty. Provocation needn’t necessarily be returned with provocation. At the moment, we’re living in a reactionary world with reactionary world leaders, whose impulsive reactions are creating endless miseries.

END OF ARTICLE